Sex in my marriage has had it's ups and downs. We've been married 13 years and lately, well the last couple of years, it's been like newlyweds and it just keeps getting better. I quit drinking 3 years ago and that was an adjustment.
We had a go around with porn. I thought that if I brought that into the bedroom I would be the best and coolest wife ever. But I got weird about it. I wanted husband to watch porn, but then I would spy on his internet use and OBSESS about what he watched and when. I spent a LOT of time agonizing over all of it when it really had no place in our home. Also, I got so self conscious about my body. Like beyond normal. It was sick. It creates expectations based in UNreality. Super unhealthy. Now we have our own porn: we have mirrored sliding closet doors. it's A-MAZ-ING. We look so good and it's REAL, and I'm feeling it when I'm seeing it.
Ok, so aside from that little porn hiccup in our sex life, we had another issue that needed dealing with: schedule. Before, we didn't have one. I never knew what to expect and when it didn't happen I would be crushed even if I didn't really WANT to in the first place. It got me thinking of all the "why doesn't he want to" BS. Blend that with the whole porn element and JEESE I was playing with fire. We made a schedule of Wed & Sat are "date night". YES adjustments can be made. But if an adjustment is made, we talk about it. There's no guessing. Sometimes I feel like I honestly could take it or leave it, but I'm ALWAYS 100% of the time glad I do it anyway.
I'm so glad to be fit and sexy now. Self confidence plays a HUGE part in horniness. See, I told you--it just keeps getting better and we're both in shape and hot for each other. It's a dream :-)
I'm glad you guys have a good sex life! :)
ReplyDeleteAnd I agree with you about the porn. I haven't had to deal with it because my husband doesn't watch it. Not that he never has, but we have both seen how damaging it can be in marriages so he stopped, which is cool. I also agree with the mirror thing. We have a mirror in our bedroom that we can move and it is AWESOME to watch during. It totally gets us both going.
A good sex life after 13 years of marriage is what I hope to have when we have been married for that long :) It's great to hear that it doesn't just "die out" even with the kids and so on.
ReplyDeleteMaybe we will try the "homemade" stuff when I feel fit and sexy hehe :)
You do not look anywhere near old enough to have been married 13 years.
ReplyDeleteBut that's awesome you guys have a great sex life after 13 years of marriage! Gives me hope. :D
xoxoxo
bottom of my feet are still tingling
ReplyDeleteyes mam, THANK YOU but I'm almost stupid 36! I got married when I was 22 :-)
ReplyDeleteAND HOLY LORD: last night was Wednesday. Even better than I imagined when I was writing this DANG. It was like an extacy trip but felt cleaner and more satisfying WOOOOOOOOOOOO!