feeling so strong/ Versitile Blogger Award

Last night, I planned my nightly binge/purge and in a moment of strength, took my antibiotics and skipped it. Tonight I planned the same thing. I purged dinner and then went out to check out tanning salons. I knew I would not have the strength to skip my binge tonight again. We had Salmon and rice and asparagus and I purged it what a bastard. Anyway, I got home and "put my husband to bed" hee hee. Kids were on the couch with a movie (no school tomorrow! dangit) I started cleaning the dinner dishes and deciding what to eat and in what order and I just realized I wasn't dying for anything in particular. So I grabbed all my eve meds which I had been waiting to take till after any purging, and I just took them quick and now I CANT purge so I can't binge that's all there is to it!

okay, I have to explain about all the tanning talk. I live in the pacific northwest and it's a FACT we get like, way less sun than everywhere else. It's depressing. A lot of people go year round to tanning salons just for the mood improvement and healthy glow. I'm going to California in July and I mean, I guess it's FINE to totally be white. But for me, I have a lot of stretch marks and flapsy flubb, and that all gets toned and looks better, when tan. I haven't tanned in years and I just did all this weight loss and I think this is the icing on the cake I'm so excited. I went for 8 min tonight and it was pure bliss!

I shall now fulfill my Versitile Blogger Award Obligation, lest I'm seen as ungrateful. I'm not, I only feel unworthy :-)
I love every single one of my followers, like, a ridiculous amount. But I think everyone's already done this or they don't have a blog, they only read.
I would only like to bestow this award to one girl: My friend, the lovely, Deanna M. Deanna, if you are reading this, I'm not putting a link to your blog because you might not appreciate the traffic. But please accept this award.

You must give it to other people, I'm not sure how many. I'm pretty sure it's more than one so I'm breaking a rule but it's ok. AND you're supposed to tell 7 random things about yourself.

1. I ran away with the circus when I was 19.
2. I have gotten 2 DUI's. One in 1994 when I was only 18 and not even old enough to drink! the other on November 30 of 2007. My sobriety date is the next day - 12/1/07.
3. I attend AA meetings regularly. It works
4. I have an associates degree in accounting. I like the work but.....
5. I'm a stay at home mom. I love it but I have been thinking (JUST THINKING) about going back to work. HA, I got an application for the tanning salon I just joined tonight.
6. I KINDA work though because I'm the manager for our apartment complex. It's only got 16 units. We're full so there isn't a whole lot to be done. Keep the place tidy, be around. we get 2/3's off our rent.
7. I'm a sex abuse survivor. I was molested/raped by an older step brother from the age of 8 - 12. I go through periods of bug out's over it. At the moment, I'm ok. It's been a while since I bugged. I was in therapy and it was like we uncovered feelings, it got too heavy. I guess I play this trick on myself where I think I'm pretty open about it so I must be ok and not shoving feelings or being in denial. But it's a trick. I know it is, but it's a survival mechanism and I choose to do it because when I DID go weird about it when I was in therapy, I couldn't function. I had to be able to take care of the fam, so I stopped going to therapy and stopped "dealing" with it. She said that might happen and she was right.

that's it. xo

Thank you again, Hana. Sorry I took so long